Next month a social worker will come into my home and decide whether I can provide a safe, stable and loving home.  As an attorney, I’ve seen clients panic over home studies.  Because of the type of law I practice, my clients are subject to home studies during hotly contested custody battles and stepparent adoptions.  I’ve told those clients not to worry, that the social worker wants you to be successful.  Now that it’s my turn, even though I know what it’s all about, I’m nervous.

The other thing that amazes me is the increased cost of EVERYTHING the minute you add the word “adoption” to any other word.  It’s like wedding cakes.  A nice bakery cake for a birthday costs $50.  3 tiers should therefore cost $150.  However, if you add the word “wedding” to the word “cake,” the cost increases by a factor of 20.  So it is with home studies.  In custody battles and stepparent adoptions, the cost of a home study in and around the metroplex averages around $600-900 total.  Add the word “adoption” to the words “home study” and the cost becomes $2300 for the initial study plus another $500-800 for the post-placement updates.  Aye yai yai!  And this is only one of the many costs that is paid over and above the $22,000 agency fee!

So what is the social worker looking for and how am I preparing for this intimate in-home evaluation?

Well, I’m taking a lot of deep breaths.  I’m trying to remember that as a gainfully employed, non-drug addict, with no criminal history who has a modest, but comfortable home, I am primed for success.  Social workers really do want you to succeed in a home study because so many children need safe and stable homes.  I bought a gently used second hand crib with a nice mattress and a few wall decorations that were 1/2 priced at Hobby Lobby.  I don’t need to buy diapers, toys, bottles or clothes yet.  I simply need to show the social worker that baby will have a room and that her needs will be met.  I’ll dust and vacuum before the social worker arrives.  Then I will simply answer her questions honestly and make sure she knows how badly I want a child and that I am able to care for a child emotionally, physically and financially.  That’s all the social worker wants to know.

Now, if only these deep breaths would start working!